Here we go again!

I am currently scanning in 91 profiles. It is a tedious process of putting them in the scanner, clicking the scan button, waiting for it to scan, taking the profile out, right clicking on the image, and typing in a name that I am quite sure I will never be able to pronounce.

And yet, these profiles bring me joy. The thought of each of them being sponsored, of each of their lives being radically changed is what keeps me going. The privilege of telling each child that there is a God who knew them before He created the world, and He has not forgotten them, and He has sent them help!

I have spent countless hours on the phone with people I know well and people I have only known a few weeks and people halfway around the world that I can barely understand, hours on the internet, hours in meetings with chicken farmers and teacher trainers, hours discussing and pondering and reliving. But not nearly enough time just praying.

So somewhere along the way, the joy was lost. And I found myself at a pity party. Where I told God, that I might have put my yes on the table, but I did not ask for all of this. I am not cut out for all of this, and I am surely not worthy of the accolades that have come along with all of this.

God's grace never ceases to amaze, simply because it never ceases. He is patient with my whining, but He does not coddle. We have come to far for that. When I am ready to turn from my sinful "I do not have enough time in my day to pray that much" ways, and fall at His feet, He is there to remind me that...

"My friends, adoption is redemption. It's costly, exhausting, expensive, and outrageous. Buying back lives costs so much. When God set out to redeem us, it killed Him." quote from Derek Loux, an adoptive dad who was recently killed in a car accident.

He never said this would be easy. Did he, Erin? ;)

Looking through these pictures tonight, I am reminded that although it is not easy, it is worth it. They are worth it. And more than anything, He is worth it. Worth the best of me, and not what is leftover after I have poured out to everyone else.

Maybe I have had some spiritual warfare happening, but I listened to a sermon recently that said the best way to combat spiritual warfare is to just turn to God, repent, and preach the Gospel. Stand firm and press forward.

We leave on Wednesday, and I am so excited to get back to the place where this crazy new adventure all began. I will post our itinerary tomorrow, we would all love your prayers.

Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me.

Psalm 51:12